My female colleague constantly looks at porn on her mobile. She makes no attempt to hide it.
I don’t think this is appropriate or funny.
Often, she’ll shriek: “Come and look at this.”
She’ll beg me to stop what I’m doing, leave my desk and ogle at whatever smut she’s accessing on her screen – the dirtier and grubbier the better.
She’s audacious. She particularly likes looking at threesomes – two girls and a guy, that’s her thing.
She keeps the sound on, and the grunts and groans turn my stomach.
Since the pandemic we’ve been relocated to a scruffy office on the outskirts of our town. It’s cheap and rundown and I feel as though I’ve ended up in Hades.
This woman is sort of my boss, but only because she’s been employed by our firm for slightly longer than I have. Our main boss is still working from home so it’s all a bit of mess.
Basically, there’s no one around for her to answer to and she’s taking advantage. The problem is that while she ogles, I’m doing all the work.
Ethics and morals aside, I’m carrying the can and keeping this place going while she’s getting turned on. I can’t tell you how long she also spends in the loo –and that turns my stomach too.
I’m sick of being taken advantage of.
I’ve told her that she’s got a problem, but she simply laughs in my face. She argues that men look at porn all the time so why shouldn’t she?
She considers me a bit of a nerd. The other day she got in some beers and tried to order to me stop work and have a party. But I’m a conscientious type – I have bills to pay.
How do I get her to start respecting my position without coming across as a killjoy?
JANE SAYS: I pity you having to work in this hellhole.
Not only is the building horrible but the management is neglectful and poor.
Your colleague is a selfish nightmare. Usually, in unsatisfactory situations like this, I’d advise readers to speak to their boss or someone in HR, but if neither is an option, then would you consider checking out acas.org.uk (0300 123 1100) for information and employment advice?
Do you feel you’re a victim of sexual harassment? Does she violate your dignity or create a hostile or degrading work environment? Don’t be too embarrassed to bring up any or all of these issues.
Don’t be tempted to bottle this up either. Explain to friends and family how much you struggle on a daily basis and see if they have any advice or support to offer you.
As for your smutty colleague, she needs to hear that you will not be distracted again.
What she’s doing is disrespectful and inappropriate.
Write down everything that has happened so far and start to keep a daily diary.
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